So some friends and I were talking about this Pole Dancin' for Jesus class the other day. Honestly, it was kind of hard to wrap my mind around the idea of it. Maybe it's because in most of the strip clubs I've ever been to there's nothing really holy going on. So it's kind of hard to reconcile the idea of bringing church there.
I really didn't think much of it because it seemed to be a novel idea that probably wouldn't go further than that gym in Texas. Boy was I wrong....
(source)
O...M...freaking...G!!!!!!
I have so many questions!!!
Am I supposed to take this guy seriously? Did I really just see this so-and-so work that pole like one of Magic City's finest...for Jesus? Where did he learn how to do this? Why is the pole sitting by the front door? Is this how Christians greet their guests in 2011? Do you have to climb to the top and drop into a split while praying before you can take a seat or be offered libations? Is this some new millienium praise dancing? If so, what part of the bible is he interpreting for us? 'Cause I surely don't recall a Book of Bullshit...but I haven't read my copy of the Dead Sea Scrolls lately so I can't say for sure that that book does not exist.
When I go to church on Sunday will Pastor be introducing "The Ass-Clappin' Angels" or some other high-flying, lap dancing, praise dancing troupe? Will the deacons be making it rain on the alter? Will I need to pack extra dollars for a special building fund collection? I need to know now. Because I'm liable to fall out if I see it. And it won't be because of the Holy Ghost.
Look, I don't wanna knock this man's ministry but....something in the milk ain't clean! And honestly it's not just because of the pole. It's because it's a DUDE. A DUDE working the pole...for Jesus. Not saying that a broad giving it all she's got for the Good Lord is a good thing but...it's not a DUDE! Then again it could be I'm just a little jelly. I can hardly do a push-up, so I damn sure know I can't do what he just did...
I take that back. I know I could, but there would be lots of alcohol and debauchery involved. Definitely no Jesus. And it wouldn't be caught on tape. Tee's ho shit is for mental recall only.
I swear I don't know what to do with this. He's praising the Lord in his own way so I don't want to say that he shouldn't but....I really don't think he should be doing this. Am I wrong? What do you good people think? Is pole dancing for Jesus a good thing? Or is this dude just a heathen trying to hustle his way into Heaven with some foolishness?
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