YouTube Shenanigans: Who Run What?

The original version of this video has probably caused more seizures than Mary Hart's voice in the 80's. 

But this shit right here?  I'll bet this months shoe budget that somewhere in the world somebody is experiencing more side effects from this shit than anybody ever had from Phen Fen and lead paint.


(source)

Yo....if I was Beyonce I would be super pissed right now.  She rocked her ass in her video.  I'm talking better moves than Turbo AND Boogaloo Shrimp.  Anybody that can make the Stanky Leg look that sexy is just.....a boss.  I'll give her that and I'm not even a fan.

I'm sure when Beyonce wrote this song she wanted women to feel powerful.  She wanted us to feel like we could take on anything.  Well, I'm here to tell you that some people got that message and straight twisted the message and took advantage of the community service that Mrs. Knowles-Carter was putting down.

Like Ices.  Ices damn Brown.  In her quest to empower herself this heffa insists on posting videos exhibiting her total disregard for all things sensical and rhythmic on these innanets. 

I'm not sure who keeps sending this broad requesteses but Imma need for you clowns to cease and desist.  Because Ices don't need no power.  Ices needs to have a damn seat.  A whole damn row of them. 

And before you go and call me a hater, let me tell you that NO I don't hate Ices Brown.  At least not yet, but honestly her videos are putting her really close to Oprah on my list of people to evict from the universe.

Anyway as I was saying, as of this moment, I don't hate her.  I simply hate what she does.

I hate that she gets in front of webcams and shakes her jelly on a 4 beat delay.  I hate that she's wearing those leggings.  I hate that she has to constantly pull them up.  I hate that she took this ridiculousness outside in nature and all the woodland creatures in her neighborhood had to be subjected it.  I hate that she can't read.  I hate that she says "requesteses".  I hate that her parents haven't yoked her up and ended her on air shenanigans. 

Hold up.  You know what?  Fuck it.  I DO hate Ices.  I hate everything that she stands for.  And you know what else?  I'm blaming Oprah for this.